And now, our yearly custom continues…
[queuing up sexy saxophone music]
How YOU doin’?
Right this moment is Ken Day, bebeh doll, and which means I am right here to make all of your attractive, attractive goals come true.
Besides possibly that one.
(By no means once more, Cancun. NEVER AGAIN.)
That is proper, my sprinkle-coated sugar dumpling, I’m about to rock your world … by dealing you a hand of Blackjack:
Or, wait… this can be a scorching tub? Oh. Okay. EVEN BETTER. Mrowr.
Now, slide that candy little persona of yours over right here, and have an infinite glass of ketchup:
I warmed up this facet of the concrete slab only for you. [eyebrow waggle]
What’s fallacious, my tangy berry candy tart? Is the concrete to not your liking?
Maybe you’d favor some Satin Ice* sheets?
I do not lounge this casually for simply anybody, you already know. Largely as a result of I lack articulated elbows.
(*That one’s for you, decorators.)
These boxers are actually confining, although, my delicious fondant-wrapped cheesecake chunk.
Right here, let me slip into one thing a bit of extra snug:
You possibly can’t see it, however I am completely flexing for you proper now. Unnng.
Ahh, I can inform by your dismayed expression that you just’re pondering EXACTLY what I am pondering, my honey-drenched pudding pop: this DOES cowl up too lots of my “finer belongings.” [wink] Nicely, do not you are concerned. I can repair that.
Okay, my candy-coated cake pop! Put together to fulfill … THE LOINCLOTH OF LOVE:
Take me away, officer; I give up to YOUR SEXINESS.
Oh, and I ought to warn you: objects within the rear view are a lot hotter than they seem.
Because of Sara O., Sanne V., Mary Ann B., Frank M., Laura S., Renee D., & Lauri M. for serving to me retroactively wreck lots of people’s childhoods.
A couple of years in the past, after John and I first revealed this submit, we obtained an e-mail from readers Charity and Royce. That e-mail contained an audio file. An audio file that, as soon as performed, would change our lives ceaselessly.
Or at the very least make us snigger like hyenas for a superb 5 minutes.
So in the present day, in your wrecking pleasure, we current that audio, mixed with our unique visuals. Flip up the quantity, and ENJOY.
Observe from john (thoJ): Once I was making this video, I pitched down Royce’s voice only a bit for sexiness. Once I confirmed Jen, she requested if I might pitch it method UP. The result’s, if potential, much more hysterical.
So I current to you… The chipmunk model!
P.S. Want a candy present for the one that has all the things? Then how a few card that transforms right into a bouquet:
You mail these flat like a greeting card, then they pop up into the prettiest bouquet! I’ve despatched a few these to each my dad and mom and grandmother now. Contemporary Minimize has a number of totally different colours and flower preparations to select from, and I ship mine straight from Amazon, so with Prime it is free transport!